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I remember taking guitar lessons when I was younger. There’s a lot you can learn in a short amount of time.
I’ve been looking for a new doctor. The main reasons for that are my current one doesn’t take my secondary insurance, and she didn’t listen to me during the last visit. I got a bill in the mail for what my primary insurance didn’t pay. It’s not much, but I’d like to find a doctor who will take both. I’m still having back pain, and I’ve been having some pain and numbness in my right leg. I also am having a lot of stomach problems, it seems to hurt really often and I’m always running to the bathroom. The doctor thought it was because of anxiety, but I don’t think that’s the only reason. I’m always tired and have no energy.
I need a doctor who will listen and send me somewhere to have these things checked out. I’ve also gained a lot of weight, that might be because of the amounts of medications I’m on and the high doses. My depression has been bad as well. I thought that maybe it was because of the holidays, but they are over so I guess it’s not that. I see my psych doctor on Tuesday. I’m going to tell him that maybe it’s time to change my antidepressant to something I’ve never been on. It sucks feeling so blah and having no energy to get anything done.
Side note: I’ve opened an Etsy Shop.
I saw this writing prompt entry and decided to do it.
Reflecting on last year
- A happy memory was having a period of time when I wasn’t feeling so depressed for a few months.
- I was challenged by figuring out how to do sponsored blog posts. It took me some time to learn how to do it correctly.
- I was surprised by the election results.
- I learned to just ignore my new neighbors, even though they drive me nuts.
- I regret treating some people poorly because of mood swings and depression.
- I accomplished one of my goals of writing more.
- I feel good about going to a new therapist.
- I took care of myself by going to regular doctor and therapy visits.
- I wasted time/energy on worrying about things I can’t control.
- I’m grieving a friendship I had to end.
- I’m angry about the results of the election and how it will affect people, and how other people tend to treat me.
- I’m grateful for a place to live.
Looking forward to the new year
- I’m excited about new series and movies coming to Netflix.
- I plan to just keep going.
- I’m worried about losing my insurance and other things.
- When things don’t go as planned I will research an alternative.
- I wish for better health.
- This year is going to be great because it’s a fresh start.
- My intention for this year is to make it better than the last.
- I will take care of myself by spending much needed time to myself.
- Every day I plan to do something I enjoy.
- I will show myself compassion by not beating myself up for my mistakes.
- This year I want to add more friends to my life.
- I will accept myself by embracing my good qualities.
- I will accept others by listening to them.
- I will focus on doing what I can do and be ok if some things don’t get done immediately. One step at a time.
On New Year’s Eve, there were fireworks but I wasn’t able to see them well with all the trees in the way. They were on the other side of the complex and this place is huge. The country club next door does them. I didn’t have enough time to get over there because they were over so quickly. The fireworks on the 4th of July and New Year’s Eve used to be good, now they’re not. Probably budget cuts or something. I really wanted to go to the music festival that was on Friday and Saturday night, but the tickets were very expensive and the transportation would have cost too much because it was a bit far.
I’m actually glad the holidays are over because they make me depressed. Today I spent most of the day in bed because I just felt so lousy. I met with my new therapist last week and he seemed really nice. He thinks I’m depressed because of the holidays too.
I got a notice on my door the other day that the water here is going to be off from January 3-6 from 8-5. That’s really crazy. Whenever there is a leak, water to the entire property has to be shut off. They’re doing this to fix it so that doesn’t have to happen. It’s still really inconvenient to be without water for 8 hours for 3 days. I will have to put water in containers to get by until it’s back on in the evening.
Anyway, I hope everyone had a good holiday. I hope this year is better. I’m terrible at keeping New Year’s resolutions, so my resolution for this year is to just keep going.
“It isn’t only a new year; it is a new chance for everyone to restart.” – Mohammed Sekouty